Ah, disappointment. My old “friend” showing up again. And again. What will I do with you this time? Get angry? Sad? Bitter?
I’m tired of being disappointed. So I’m choosing not to be. I’m choosing joy instead. Not happiness, don’t get me wrong. I’m NOT happy. But I am joyful. I am reminded daily of my blessings. And I choose to dwell in gratitude, not grief.
Rejection. That’s a tough one. But in the end, it’s not really on me. I give and give – sometimes too much. Better too much than too little. Little tiny lies imbed in me. “You’re not (pretty, thin, smart, etc) enough.” Damn those lies. I am enough. I embrace my beauty – inside and out. I own my intelligence and strength. And I’ve grown! Oh how I’ve grown!
Exhaustion. Being so tired of waiting on God. Waiting on your heart’s desire. Waiting on something that may never happen. Waiting on something you inherently believe you were made for: relationship. Yet continuously left alone. Lonely. Rejected. Disappointed. Exhausted.
Gratitude. Joy. Beauty. Strength. These things take precedent over the sin and lies and sorrow and darkness. I walk in them.
I am a gorgeous, vibrant daughter of the Most High God. And it is His will I am walking in. Always.
Thank you God, for protection. For Your will above my own. For You, only, first in my heart.
Thank you for this Sacred Mess. This path. I choose to walk daily in Your way. Take this sacred mess and make it Yours more and more.